Control the narrative, define your time
All your friends are in relationships, married, with kids and you are…well…stuck.
It is so easy to fall into this line of thinking. As much as these statements on your friend’s life phase may be factual it does not affect your life or your plans; that narrative is controlled by you.
Saying this, in this situation I have found it is easy to plan things in your head but not follow through as the intrusive thoughts take over:
- ‘I’ll do it next year’
- ‘I have no one to do it with’
- ‘What if…’
I resonate with the anxiety that comes with planning summer when you are a solo gal. It can subconsciously be intimidating. You end dreaming of ‘one day I will…’ but, honestly, you wake up and find summer is over resulting in you kicking yourself for the plans you did not commit to. Make the most of the summer months, the warm days and sunshine by following these tips:
- Plan in Advance – ignore the ‘ what if’ e.g. ‘but what if someone new comes along’, ‘but what if I someone wants to do something that day’, ‘but what if…” No. Stop. This only results in us bookmarking space for non-existent plans which never come into fruition and result in a wasted summer and missed opportunities for us to experience. What’s for you won’t go by you, if something is meant to happen it will. So book out your summer with spa trips, day trips, roller discos and painting classes. It is your time, it is your summer. Plans can change, flex and adapt so you will not miss put if something comes up – just change your plan
- Start Small – It can be intimidating to solo travel, especially after a stint of not travelling but making the most of your summer does not necessarily mean jetting off to exotic places if that is not what calls to you at this point in time. Start off by booking day trips and evening activities to help get your confidence up. Research local areas or islands where you can hire a bike, bring a backpack with a picnic and a book and you are sorted for a budget friendly experience
- Ask Around – you will be surprised at who will want to come on adventures or experiences with you out of your friend group, even if they are happily married with kids. They still have a life. Weekends away locally, incorporating a road trip, or a simple afternoon tea are simple experiences will help define your summer and create everlasting memories with your friends
- Solo Travel – If you are feeling confident about solo travel there is no need to wait for someone to accompany you. Do your research, pick a location and go. That’s it. That’s the secret. We put so much in our own way that stops us from doing things we know we want to. If you are not confident you could travel to another location or country where you have contacts, this will help ease the nerves as you have a familiar face who you are going to visit
Take control and define your summer, they are fleeting and limited in nature and a prime time to do what makes your heart content. Try new things, make the most of sunny nights, most importantly make memories that will last a lifetime